Post by LoneWolf on Aug 1, 2009 8:22:44 GMT -8
Cause I was bored! XD I got the idea from Jade's fanfiction thing she found.
------
Many voices are heard, noises, other things. Then once a glass is clinked; silence.
"All right, everbody sit down, quiet down, listen up. I brought you all here to recite the annual obituaries. Like every year, we'll start with A and we'll end with Z. All right, is the band ready?"
"Ready."
"All right, hit it, boils."
"And a one, and a two." Music starts.
A Is For Akito
Who Drowned In A Pool
Akito looks up. "What?!"
"Sorry, you're dead. Blame you're mother for giving you a name that had to come first. NEXT!"
B Is For Bandit
Who Was Eaten By Ghouls
"That's not even my real name!" Bandit exclaims throwing his arms in the air.
"Too late, you're dead. So sorry. Now for C!"
C Is For Connor
With Disease Of The Brain
"Wait a minute, what kind of disease?" Connor questioned.
"The killing kind. Duh. Anyway!"
D Is For Devon
Derailed On A Train
"I'm not human. That can't kill me." Devon replies matter-of-fact.
"Yeah, but you were ripped to pieces in the process then the train blew up. Look at the bright side, you can see Akito on the other side now! Now..."
E Is For Ember
Who Was Buried Alive
"Hey! I'm a vampire too!" Ember exclaimed.
"Yoshiaki turned you human. Oops, issues with that, eh? Time for 'F'!"
F Is For Faith
Who Was Stabbed Through The Eye
"With what exactly?" Faith asked.
"Something long and sharp of course. Now that that's done..."
G Is For George
Who Died In The Womb
"Who?" Many people question.
"Died in the womb, you'll never know! Hm... May have been named something different... Anyway!!"
H Is For Hikari
Who Was Sealed In A Tomb
"I dun wanna die!!" Hikari squeals.
"So sorry. Now get in the tomb!"
One By One, We Bite The Dust
We Kick The Bucket And Begin To Rust
Give Up The Ghost When Your Number's Up
We All Fall Down
Ashes To Ashes, Bones To Paste
You'll Wither Away In Your Resting Place
Eternity In A Wooden Case
We All Fall Down
I Is For Illyria
Who Lost Her Front Brakes
"You can't kill me! I am God! God!!!" Illyria is certainly not happy with this.
"Sorry. God died. If you're wondering how she was ripped to peices and the car got set on fire! Duh... Now for 'J'!"
J Is For Justin
Who Was Bitten By Snakes
"Wait... Snakes? No. Come on! Don't kill me!" Justin complained.
"To late! You're dead! Haha sucka! ... I mean, so sorry. Anyway..."
K Is For Kiyoshi
Who Was Shot In The Head
"Um... Who shot me?" Kiyoshi asks.
"Druggies! You still owed them money. Next time pay up. Oh... There won't be a next time... So sorry. L time!"
L Is For Lee Sohma
Who Bled And Bled
"Huh?" Lee seems confused...
"You're dead. That simple. Bye! Now..."
M Is For Myra
Who Burned To A Crisp
"Wait... What? I'm gonna burn!? D*mn you..." Myra is obviously upset.
"Yep. You're dead. Now for..."
N Is For Nawat
Who Was Pummled By Fists
"I'm a Fae. I wouldn't have been 'pummled by fists'." Nawat sounds sceptical.
" ... Werewolf fists?"
O Is For Olivia
Who Lived Life Too Fast
"Livey go to fast?" We've confused the five year old.
"Yep. WAY to fast. Time for the letter 'P'!"
P Is For Peter
Who Swallowed Some Glass
"Okay... Ouch." Peter just looks like that would hurt.
"Yes. Very painful. Now for singing!"
Laa laa laa laa laa laa laa laa la la la. Laa laa laa laa laa laa laa laa la la la. Laa laa laa laa laa laa laa laa la la la.
"All right, lot, all together now."
One By One, We Bite The Dust
We Kick The Bucket And Begin To Rust
Give Up The Ghost When Your Number's Up
We All Fall Down
Ashes To Ashes, Bones To Paste
You'll Wither Away In Your Resting Place
Eternity In A Wooden Case
We All Fall Down
Q Is For Quil
Who Took The Wrong Trail
"I can turn into a wolf. How could I take the wrong trail?" Another sceptic.
"You followed the map. Oops, gave you the wrong one! Next victim!"
R Is For Ren
Who Rotted In Jail
"Now I'm in jail? This is ridiculus." Ren is just annoying.
"Yep, too bad Akito had to die first. She would have loved this. Now!"
S Is For Shani
Who Was Shot With A Bow
"Okay, come on! You can't kill me! I mean... It was an illusion." He's in denial.
"Nope. You're dead. So sorry. Okay, who next?"
T Is For Takara
Who Froze In The Snow
"Cold? Cold? Snow? What you're killing me?" Takara is just a little crazy so that's how things have gone.
"Yeps. NEXT!"
U Is For Umbry
Who Trampled By Hooves
"Trampled? What type of hooves?" This one sounds like Faith up there.
"The ones that killed you. Now for 'V'!"
V Is or Victoria
Who Fell Off A Roof
"Excuse me. Another vampire. That would not kill me." Victoria almost sounds like another sceptic.
"Into a burning pit of fire. There. Anyway..."
W Is For Warren
Who Was Hit By A Car
"Wha?" Another confused one.
"You got hit by a car in wolf form, then there was a boom. You were exploded. NEXT!"
X Is For Xavier
Who Sunk In The Tar
"But... Where did the tar come from?" Xavier asked.
"Somewhere. Almost done!"
Y Is For Yuki
Who Fell From A Plane
"Why was I on a plane? I don't need to go anywhere..." Yuki, another sceptic. Great.
"Because I put you on one. Now for 'Z'!"
Z Is For Zenri
Who Simply Went
Insane
"Ha! I'm not dead!" Zenri seems triumphant.
"Wait a minute..." Zenri is shot in the head. "All done!"
------
Not as funny as the other. But it was really fun to make. x3
------
Many voices are heard, noises, other things. Then once a glass is clinked; silence.
"All right, everbody sit down, quiet down, listen up. I brought you all here to recite the annual obituaries. Like every year, we'll start with A and we'll end with Z. All right, is the band ready?"
"Ready."
"All right, hit it, boils."
"And a one, and a two." Music starts.
A Is For Akito
Who Drowned In A Pool
Akito looks up. "What?!"
"Sorry, you're dead. Blame you're mother for giving you a name that had to come first. NEXT!"
B Is For Bandit
Who Was Eaten By Ghouls
"That's not even my real name!" Bandit exclaims throwing his arms in the air.
"Too late, you're dead. So sorry. Now for C!"
C Is For Connor
With Disease Of The Brain
"Wait a minute, what kind of disease?" Connor questioned.
"The killing kind. Duh. Anyway!"
D Is For Devon
Derailed On A Train
"I'm not human. That can't kill me." Devon replies matter-of-fact.
"Yeah, but you were ripped to pieces in the process then the train blew up. Look at the bright side, you can see Akito on the other side now! Now..."
E Is For Ember
Who Was Buried Alive
"Hey! I'm a vampire too!" Ember exclaimed.
"Yoshiaki turned you human. Oops, issues with that, eh? Time for 'F'!"
F Is For Faith
Who Was Stabbed Through The Eye
"With what exactly?" Faith asked.
"Something long and sharp of course. Now that that's done..."
G Is For George
Who Died In The Womb
"Who?" Many people question.
"Died in the womb, you'll never know! Hm... May have been named something different... Anyway!!"
H Is For Hikari
Who Was Sealed In A Tomb
"I dun wanna die!!" Hikari squeals.
"So sorry. Now get in the tomb!"
One By One, We Bite The Dust
We Kick The Bucket And Begin To Rust
Give Up The Ghost When Your Number's Up
We All Fall Down
Ashes To Ashes, Bones To Paste
You'll Wither Away In Your Resting Place
Eternity In A Wooden Case
We All Fall Down
I Is For Illyria
Who Lost Her Front Brakes
"You can't kill me! I am God! God!!!" Illyria is certainly not happy with this.
"Sorry. God died. If you're wondering how she was ripped to peices and the car got set on fire! Duh... Now for 'J'!"
J Is For Justin
Who Was Bitten By Snakes
"Wait... Snakes? No. Come on! Don't kill me!" Justin complained.
"To late! You're dead! Haha sucka! ... I mean, so sorry. Anyway..."
K Is For Kiyoshi
Who Was Shot In The Head
"Um... Who shot me?" Kiyoshi asks.
"Druggies! You still owed them money. Next time pay up. Oh... There won't be a next time... So sorry. L time!"
L Is For Lee Sohma
Who Bled And Bled
"Huh?" Lee seems confused...
"You're dead. That simple. Bye! Now..."
M Is For Myra
Who Burned To A Crisp
"Wait... What? I'm gonna burn!? D*mn you..." Myra is obviously upset.
"Yep. You're dead. Now for..."
N Is For Nawat
Who Was Pummled By Fists
"I'm a Fae. I wouldn't have been 'pummled by fists'." Nawat sounds sceptical.
" ... Werewolf fists?"
O Is For Olivia
Who Lived Life Too Fast
"Livey go to fast?" We've confused the five year old.
"Yep. WAY to fast. Time for the letter 'P'!"
P Is For Peter
Who Swallowed Some Glass
"Okay... Ouch." Peter just looks like that would hurt.
"Yes. Very painful. Now for singing!"
Laa laa laa laa laa laa laa laa la la la. Laa laa laa laa laa laa laa laa la la la. Laa laa laa laa laa laa laa laa la la la.
"All right, lot, all together now."
One By One, We Bite The Dust
We Kick The Bucket And Begin To Rust
Give Up The Ghost When Your Number's Up
We All Fall Down
Ashes To Ashes, Bones To Paste
You'll Wither Away In Your Resting Place
Eternity In A Wooden Case
We All Fall Down
Q Is For Quil
Who Took The Wrong Trail
"I can turn into a wolf. How could I take the wrong trail?" Another sceptic.
"You followed the map. Oops, gave you the wrong one! Next victim!"
R Is For Ren
Who Rotted In Jail
"Now I'm in jail? This is ridiculus." Ren is just annoying.
"Yep, too bad Akito had to die first. She would have loved this. Now!"
S Is For Shani
Who Was Shot With A Bow
"Okay, come on! You can't kill me! I mean... It was an illusion." He's in denial.
"Nope. You're dead. So sorry. Okay, who next?"
T Is For Takara
Who Froze In The Snow
"Cold? Cold? Snow? What you're killing me?" Takara is just a little crazy so that's how things have gone.
"Yeps. NEXT!"
U Is For Umbry
Who Trampled By Hooves
"Trampled? What type of hooves?" This one sounds like Faith up there.
"The ones that killed you. Now for 'V'!"
V Is or Victoria
Who Fell Off A Roof
"Excuse me. Another vampire. That would not kill me." Victoria almost sounds like another sceptic.
"Into a burning pit of fire. There. Anyway..."
W Is For Warren
Who Was Hit By A Car
"Wha?" Another confused one.
"You got hit by a car in wolf form, then there was a boom. You were exploded. NEXT!"
X Is For Xavier
Who Sunk In The Tar
"But... Where did the tar come from?" Xavier asked.
"Somewhere. Almost done!"
Y Is For Yuki
Who Fell From A Plane
"Why was I on a plane? I don't need to go anywhere..." Yuki, another sceptic. Great.
"Because I put you on one. Now for 'Z'!"
Z Is For Zenri
Who Simply Went
Insane
"Ha! I'm not dead!" Zenri seems triumphant.
"Wait a minute..." Zenri is shot in the head. "All done!"
------
Not as funny as the other. But it was really fun to make. x3
