Post by Platinum on Oct 13, 2009 18:33:53 GMT -8
For those who want to understand Kiyoshi...
--
Step one, you say, 'We need to talk"
He walks, you say, Sit down, it's just a talk''
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Just another one. That was all he needed. Just one more.
Kiyoshi lay on the bathroom floor, looking up at the ceiling. The lights hurt his eyes when he starred strait up at them, but he couldn't seem to tear his eyes away from them. It was a bug to a light. Was he a bug now? A disturbance in human life? Something annoying that deserved to be squashed?
Myra didn't seem to think so. She loved him, right? He gulped, and everything they had done together replayed in his head.
"I love you, Kiyoshi." Every kiss was filled with love. And she meant everything she had said about loving him. If she knew what else he had been putting in his mouth and viens, would she kiss him then? No. She'd be revolted.
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
You begin to wonder why you came
Myra. He knew his high was over when he started thinking about her. Myra. Her voice and face haunting his brain. He groaned and shut his eyes. He proceded to slam the back of his head against the floor. It was like, teasing him. Taunting him. See? Look what you've done, Kiyoshi. If she find out, she'll hate you. You're killed yourself and in the process killing her.
No! He refused to believe that he was killing her. It was his body and he could do with it what ever he d*** well pleased.
Then he remembered his original thoughts. One more. He needed to fnd one more pill. One more dose. And then he'd be fine. Perfectly fine.
He got up and unlocked the door to the bathroom and walked to his room. His sister passed by and wrinkled her small, cute, button nose. Kiyoshi had always compaired to his twin sister to a pixie or a fairy. Something cute that sat on buttercups.
"You smell like puke. Are you feeling okay?" Kyoshi asked him, tilting her head at him, actually concerned.
"I'm fine, just a stomach ache." He lied. He had been getting really good at that recently.
"Oh... okay... but go take a shower." She grimaced and he let out a short laugh as she walked away from him and he locked himself up in his room.
He fished through his stuff, managed to find around twenty dollars. He would need more then that. He sighed and sat down on his bed. Kira's old pills were starting to run out... he could ask his sister for money, she was always borrowing his, anyways.
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Kiyoshi walked to his sister's room. He walked in and saw that she was reading something.
"Kyoshi, I need money." He satated bluntly.
She looked up lazily at him. "Why?" She asked.
"... Meds." He said to her. She'd think he was getting something for his stomach. This was the second time in ten minutes that he lied to his sister.
"Go ask mom." She said, and turned back to her book.
"Please, Kyoshi? You owe me." He said.
"I don't have any money." She told him without looking up.
"Just give me some d*** money!" Kiyoshi snapped. That got Kyoshi's attention. He head popped up from her book.
"Kiyoshi..." She said in a soft warning. Kiyoshi turned and punched the doorframe. Kyoshi cowered into her blankets. he stormed out of the hosue, slamming all the doors behind him.
Let him know that you know best
'Cause after all, you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
He went outside, the humid air not doing much to help his thinking process. In fact, it seemed to make it worse. He soon found that he was walking towards the Sohma Main House. Most people gave him odd looks. Expect the ones who were addicts, like him. He did look like an addict. His hair was messier then normal, his green eyes had dulled and were slightly blood shot. He had dark circles around his eyes and he was paler and rail thin. He looked rather scary, too. Every body hurried past him, their eyes down towards the ground. He continued to walk, scowling at the people. They were judging him. All of them. They had no right. They weren't sinless, either. And it was his own body. He could do whatever he wanted to do to it. Since when did it matter to everyone else?
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you've told him all along
And pray to God he hears you
And pray to God he hears you
Kiyoshi showed up at the Sohma Main house, and all the maids slowly shuffled away from him as he passed and shot him side way looks. Obviously thinking bad things about it. Kiyoshi almost growled. Stupid women. All judgementle. Kira would understand. She wouldn't judge him. She'd help him. Give him money.
At least he hoped so.
And where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Kiyoshi knocked on Hatori's door, smiling at her slightly.
"You don't look to well, are you feeling okay?" Kira asked, tilting her head at him.
"I'm fine." He lied.
Kira didn't speak for a while, she just stared at him from the door way, her intense peridot eyes seeming to study him. His face remained blank, but it wasn't hard to tell he was crumbling away from his sullen eyes and sunken in cheeks. She exaimed his much paler skin and thin figure.
Finally, the boy spoke. "I need money." He said. There. Wasn't that hard to say. But what she said next surprised him so much, he just about freaked out and yelled at her. It took alot to keep his voice down, to keep from yelling out loud. She judged him too! KIra out of all people, Kira who believed everybody deserved a second chance and every body had good in them, even if it was deeply buried. Even if you couldn't see it. And she had judged him
As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you've followed
"No."
"... What? I need the money, Kira. You don't understand." He managed to sputter out.
"Do you think I'm stupid? Do you think I can't tell?" Kira asked him, raising an eyebrow.
"I need the money!" He said, sounding almost pitiful for a moment.
"No, Kiyoshi, no you don't."
"I'll die with out the drugs! I'll die with out them! You don't understand!" Kiyoshi protested, almost begging. "Please, I need the money!" The drugs must have stripped Kiyoshi of his pride because he would never beg if he was in his right mind.
"Get out of my house, Kiyoshi." Kira said, pointing to the door. Her own family had done this to her at one point in her youth, when she had been a crazy teenager in a gang. It actually helped her in the end.
Kiyoshi narrowed his eyes. "And I thought you wouldn't judge me, Kira." He hissed.
"You're just digging your own grave." She told him sadly.
"I'm half way done, you wanna pass me another shovel?" Kiyoshi snapped, before turning violently and walking away, slamming the door for her behind him.
He looked at a maid that had been staring at the two.
"What the f*** are you looking at, b****? P*** off!"
He will do one of two things
He will admit to everything
Or he'll say he's just not the same
And you'll begin to wonder why you came
Kiyoshi once again stormed out of the building, looking furious. Now how was he supposed to buy his crank? His speed? His dope? Once outside, his fist collided with the iron gate, causing it to ring deeply. His fingers slowly turned pink. The pain felt good to him, so he punched it again. And again. Each time hitting it harder untill his knuckled began to bleed. Leaving a bloody smear on the gate, he walked away, feeling a bit better since he had let out his anger. Wipping some of the blood off on his already grimey pants, he walked to the last person's house he knew.
Myra, his favorite drug.
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Kyoshi silently walked into Myra's rented house. He shut the door behind him, and saw that the girl was sitting on her small couch in her small living room. He smiled warmly at her, feeling all of his tension and frustration fade at the look of her pretty face, her pale skin, her fair hair lightly brushing her light pink cheek. Myra turned to look at him, then said, "Hey, Kiyoshi. What's up?"
"Hey Myra, nothing really." He said, coming to sit beside her, first leaning back, but then he propped his elbows on his knees and leaned forward, peering at her.
"What? Do I have something on my face?" Myra asked, n ot sarcasticly, though. Kiyoshi chucked.
"No. Just lookin' at ya." He said to her.
"... Why?" She asked, tilting her head.
"Because I think you're pretty." Kiyoshi said quite seriously. Myra blushed a bit.
"Um... Thanks.... are you feeling alright?" Myra asked him.
"Not really."
"That explains it."
There was silence for a moment.
"I need money, Myra." Kiyoshi tolkd her softly.
"Kiyoshi.... you know I don't have alot of money." Myra told him.
"Please, Myra, I need the money."
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
How to save a life
How to save a life
Kiyoshi sighed and ran his hand through his hair. "Okay." Was all that he said. Kiyoshi sighed. Myra looked over at him again.
"But... maybe I could ask Akito for some more money." She said. "What do you need it for?" Kiyoshi felt something similar to hope swell up inside of him. But it wasn't exactly hope because hope left him a long time ago, when he started using the drugs.
"Medicine." He told her.
"Okay. I'll see if Akito can lend me more money. But, Kiyoshi?" She asked, tilting her head.
"Yeah?"
"Why do you still smell like ciggarete smoke?"
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
After that, with out a word, Kiyoshi left, this time leaving the door open. The look on his face was heart breaking. It looked like his soul had been shattered into a million peices and now he was making a futile attempt to stitch them back together, but the wind kept blowing them away uhntill he was left with nothing. A hollow shell. That's what he felt.
Tears stung the boy's eyes but he fought them off. He stumbled into an alleyway, the sun had been blistering hot this morning at it had also been suffocatingly humid. Like any mid summer day. But now, all the humidity gathered up in the sky, making threating gray blue clouds that looked angry to him. But that might just be his imagination going wild.
A rat scampered over his foot, and a woman smoking something, weed, probably, scooted away untill she blended into the shadows. He was now in a worse part of town, and sadly, closer to his home now then Myra's. It really sucked to live where he lived. It's eaiser to get puleld into bad things. Gangs, drugs, prostitution.
Kiyoshi sighed and sat down on the flithy alley. The smell of urine, smoke, and beer clung to the area. You got a bad feeling from this place. Every body did.
A rain drop splashed on his shoe, but then it was a down pour, drenching him to the bone. But he wasn't cold. The rain was warm, and the air was now so thick that even Kiyoshi had to struggle to breathe in it.
And he looked up.
"What? Is that all you have? Is that all you have to say!?" He demanded towards the sky.
Kiyoshi sighed and closed his eyes. It was a quick shower, then rain was over as soon as it came. Soon the sun was out again and everything felt hot and sticky. Kiyoshi finally got up, and walked home.
Home. It never really felt right to him. At home you should feel protected.
Here, Kiyoshi felt like he was being hunted.
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
How to save a life
How to save a life[/
--
Step one, you say, 'We need to talk"
He walks, you say, Sit down, it's just a talk''
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Just another one. That was all he needed. Just one more.
Kiyoshi lay on the bathroom floor, looking up at the ceiling. The lights hurt his eyes when he starred strait up at them, but he couldn't seem to tear his eyes away from them. It was a bug to a light. Was he a bug now? A disturbance in human life? Something annoying that deserved to be squashed?
Myra didn't seem to think so. She loved him, right? He gulped, and everything they had done together replayed in his head.
"I love you, Kiyoshi." Every kiss was filled with love. And she meant everything she had said about loving him. If she knew what else he had been putting in his mouth and viens, would she kiss him then? No. She'd be revolted.
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
You begin to wonder why you came
Myra. He knew his high was over when he started thinking about her. Myra. Her voice and face haunting his brain. He groaned and shut his eyes. He proceded to slam the back of his head against the floor. It was like, teasing him. Taunting him. See? Look what you've done, Kiyoshi. If she find out, she'll hate you. You're killed yourself and in the process killing her.
No! He refused to believe that he was killing her. It was his body and he could do with it what ever he d*** well pleased.
Then he remembered his original thoughts. One more. He needed to fnd one more pill. One more dose. And then he'd be fine. Perfectly fine.
He got up and unlocked the door to the bathroom and walked to his room. His sister passed by and wrinkled her small, cute, button nose. Kiyoshi had always compaired to his twin sister to a pixie or a fairy. Something cute that sat on buttercups.
"You smell like puke. Are you feeling okay?" Kyoshi asked him, tilting her head at him, actually concerned.
"I'm fine, just a stomach ache." He lied. He had been getting really good at that recently.
"Oh... okay... but go take a shower." She grimaced and he let out a short laugh as she walked away from him and he locked himself up in his room.
He fished through his stuff, managed to find around twenty dollars. He would need more then that. He sighed and sat down on his bed. Kira's old pills were starting to run out... he could ask his sister for money, she was always borrowing his, anyways.
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Kiyoshi walked to his sister's room. He walked in and saw that she was reading something.
"Kyoshi, I need money." He satated bluntly.
She looked up lazily at him. "Why?" She asked.
"... Meds." He said to her. She'd think he was getting something for his stomach. This was the second time in ten minutes that he lied to his sister.
"Go ask mom." She said, and turned back to her book.
"Please, Kyoshi? You owe me." He said.
"I don't have any money." She told him without looking up.
"Just give me some d*** money!" Kiyoshi snapped. That got Kyoshi's attention. He head popped up from her book.
"Kiyoshi..." She said in a soft warning. Kiyoshi turned and punched the doorframe. Kyoshi cowered into her blankets. he stormed out of the hosue, slamming all the doors behind him.
Let him know that you know best
'Cause after all, you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
He went outside, the humid air not doing much to help his thinking process. In fact, it seemed to make it worse. He soon found that he was walking towards the Sohma Main House. Most people gave him odd looks. Expect the ones who were addicts, like him. He did look like an addict. His hair was messier then normal, his green eyes had dulled and were slightly blood shot. He had dark circles around his eyes and he was paler and rail thin. He looked rather scary, too. Every body hurried past him, their eyes down towards the ground. He continued to walk, scowling at the people. They were judging him. All of them. They had no right. They weren't sinless, either. And it was his own body. He could do whatever he wanted to do to it. Since when did it matter to everyone else?
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you've told him all along
And pray to God he hears you
And pray to God he hears you
Kiyoshi showed up at the Sohma Main house, and all the maids slowly shuffled away from him as he passed and shot him side way looks. Obviously thinking bad things about it. Kiyoshi almost growled. Stupid women. All judgementle. Kira would understand. She wouldn't judge him. She'd help him. Give him money.
At least he hoped so.
And where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Kiyoshi knocked on Hatori's door, smiling at her slightly.
"You don't look to well, are you feeling okay?" Kira asked, tilting her head at him.
"I'm fine." He lied.
Kira didn't speak for a while, she just stared at him from the door way, her intense peridot eyes seeming to study him. His face remained blank, but it wasn't hard to tell he was crumbling away from his sullen eyes and sunken in cheeks. She exaimed his much paler skin and thin figure.
Finally, the boy spoke. "I need money." He said. There. Wasn't that hard to say. But what she said next surprised him so much, he just about freaked out and yelled at her. It took alot to keep his voice down, to keep from yelling out loud. She judged him too! KIra out of all people, Kira who believed everybody deserved a second chance and every body had good in them, even if it was deeply buried. Even if you couldn't see it. And she had judged him
As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you've followed
"No."
"... What? I need the money, Kira. You don't understand." He managed to sputter out.
"Do you think I'm stupid? Do you think I can't tell?" Kira asked him, raising an eyebrow.
"I need the money!" He said, sounding almost pitiful for a moment.
"No, Kiyoshi, no you don't."
"I'll die with out the drugs! I'll die with out them! You don't understand!" Kiyoshi protested, almost begging. "Please, I need the money!" The drugs must have stripped Kiyoshi of his pride because he would never beg if he was in his right mind.
"Get out of my house, Kiyoshi." Kira said, pointing to the door. Her own family had done this to her at one point in her youth, when she had been a crazy teenager in a gang. It actually helped her in the end.
Kiyoshi narrowed his eyes. "And I thought you wouldn't judge me, Kira." He hissed.
"You're just digging your own grave." She told him sadly.
"I'm half way done, you wanna pass me another shovel?" Kiyoshi snapped, before turning violently and walking away, slamming the door for her behind him.
He looked at a maid that had been staring at the two.
"What the f*** are you looking at, b****? P*** off!"
He will do one of two things
He will admit to everything
Or he'll say he's just not the same
And you'll begin to wonder why you came
Kiyoshi once again stormed out of the building, looking furious. Now how was he supposed to buy his crank? His speed? His dope? Once outside, his fist collided with the iron gate, causing it to ring deeply. His fingers slowly turned pink. The pain felt good to him, so he punched it again. And again. Each time hitting it harder untill his knuckled began to bleed. Leaving a bloody smear on the gate, he walked away, feeling a bit better since he had let out his anger. Wipping some of the blood off on his already grimey pants, he walked to the last person's house he knew.
Myra, his favorite drug.
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Kyoshi silently walked into Myra's rented house. He shut the door behind him, and saw that the girl was sitting on her small couch in her small living room. He smiled warmly at her, feeling all of his tension and frustration fade at the look of her pretty face, her pale skin, her fair hair lightly brushing her light pink cheek. Myra turned to look at him, then said, "Hey, Kiyoshi. What's up?"
"Hey Myra, nothing really." He said, coming to sit beside her, first leaning back, but then he propped his elbows on his knees and leaned forward, peering at her.
"What? Do I have something on my face?" Myra asked, n ot sarcasticly, though. Kiyoshi chucked.
"No. Just lookin' at ya." He said to her.
"... Why?" She asked, tilting her head.
"Because I think you're pretty." Kiyoshi said quite seriously. Myra blushed a bit.
"Um... Thanks.... are you feeling alright?" Myra asked him.
"Not really."
"That explains it."
There was silence for a moment.
"I need money, Myra." Kiyoshi tolkd her softly.
"Kiyoshi.... you know I don't have alot of money." Myra told him.
"Please, Myra, I need the money."
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
How to save a life
How to save a life
Kiyoshi sighed and ran his hand through his hair. "Okay." Was all that he said. Kiyoshi sighed. Myra looked over at him again.
"But... maybe I could ask Akito for some more money." She said. "What do you need it for?" Kiyoshi felt something similar to hope swell up inside of him. But it wasn't exactly hope because hope left him a long time ago, when he started using the drugs.
"Medicine." He told her.
"Okay. I'll see if Akito can lend me more money. But, Kiyoshi?" She asked, tilting her head.
"Yeah?"
"Why do you still smell like ciggarete smoke?"
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
After that, with out a word, Kiyoshi left, this time leaving the door open. The look on his face was heart breaking. It looked like his soul had been shattered into a million peices and now he was making a futile attempt to stitch them back together, but the wind kept blowing them away uhntill he was left with nothing. A hollow shell. That's what he felt.
Tears stung the boy's eyes but he fought them off. He stumbled into an alleyway, the sun had been blistering hot this morning at it had also been suffocatingly humid. Like any mid summer day. But now, all the humidity gathered up in the sky, making threating gray blue clouds that looked angry to him. But that might just be his imagination going wild.
A rat scampered over his foot, and a woman smoking something, weed, probably, scooted away untill she blended into the shadows. He was now in a worse part of town, and sadly, closer to his home now then Myra's. It really sucked to live where he lived. It's eaiser to get puleld into bad things. Gangs, drugs, prostitution.
Kiyoshi sighed and sat down on the flithy alley. The smell of urine, smoke, and beer clung to the area. You got a bad feeling from this place. Every body did.
A rain drop splashed on his shoe, but then it was a down pour, drenching him to the bone. But he wasn't cold. The rain was warm, and the air was now so thick that even Kiyoshi had to struggle to breathe in it.
And he looked up.
"What? Is that all you have? Is that all you have to say!?" He demanded towards the sky.
Kiyoshi sighed and closed his eyes. It was a quick shower, then rain was over as soon as it came. Soon the sun was out again and everything felt hot and sticky. Kiyoshi finally got up, and walked home.
Home. It never really felt right to him. At home you should feel protected.
Here, Kiyoshi felt like he was being hunted.
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
How to save a life
How to save a life[/
